This week, we began reading Miracles, which is a lot less accessible than some of the other books we’ve been reading.  It approaches the concept of miracles from a philosophical standpoint, reasoning that miracles not only fit into our idea of nature, but that they are inherent to it.  I loved the connections drawn between nature and miracles.  Of course, nature is in itself a miracle, but there is so much symbolism built into the laws of nature. 

       For example, reincarnation plays a huge role in nature—Lewis gives the example of vegetables becoming seeds and buried into the ground, in a sense “dying” so that they may be “born” again.  But on a much grander scale, Christ died so we may live.  This beautiful concept is echoed in so many minute aspects of nature that we likely don’t connect it with the Resurrection.  But if we take notice, these tiny miracles all point to a bigger Miracle.

       Vicariousness is another connection to the divine.  Nature is filled with dependent relationships—we depend on animals for food, plants for oxygen, rain to quench our thirst.  Likewise, animals depend on other animals, plants depend on the sun, and the list goes on.  However, we are all dependent upon a higher source of life—Christ.  On our own, we would have nothing and we would be nothing.  This dependence is of a completely different magnitude than our dependence on cows for milk, but the concepts are definitely connected.  The examples we are given in nature all echo the miracle of the Atonement.

       I think sometimes we forget that nature is only a made-up system by the divine, it does not define reality—it is only a shadow of it.  Nature is inherently divine, but there is so much more beyond nature.  I loved what CS Lewis said about miracles “breaking” the rules of nature.  God is like an artist who can see the whole painting—He might break a few of the little rules that beginning artists wouldn’t dare break, but He plays by a higher set of rules that override the others.  That is what makes miracles not only possible, but essential to nature and to God’s design.

       So I want to discuss a little more on my topic from last week—loving God.  As I read more of Mere Christianity, my exact question was actually addressed.  Lewis acknowledges that we are told we ought to love God, but many of us can’t find those feelings within us.  His response was that we should “act as if [we] did.  Do not sit trying to manufacture feelings.  Ask yourself, ‘If I were sure that I loved God, what would I do?’  When you have found the answer, go and do it.”  Our works are the best indicator of our love for Him, I think they are what matters most to Him.  And when we do His will, I think He will bless us with the ability to love more fully, as He does.

       I also loved Lewis’ words on the Atonement.  It is an amazing gift offered to all men, yet so many reject it for meaningless counterfeits of happiness.  When we honestly discover how helpless we are, that is when we can truly give our will to God and trust in His grace.  This brings up a problem for many though: if we stop trying, will we still be saved?  If we really can’t do anything to “earn” our salvation, is there a point in obeying God still?  To me, salvation is a state of eternal happiness where we can learn to become like God.  So why wouldn’t we still strive to obey Him?  It is the only way we can come closer to Him while still on this earth, and the closest we can come to true happiness in this life.  Of course the Atonement will make up for the rest if we allow it to, but why delay the process by wallowing in apathy?  Lewis gave beautiful insight into this topic:

       “To trust Him means, of course, trying to do all that He says. There would be no sense in saying you trusted a person if you would not take his advice. Thus if you have really handed yourself over to Him, it must follow that you are trying to obey Him. But trying in a new way, a less worried way. Not doing these things in order to be saved, but because He has begun to save you already. Not hoping to get to Heaven as a reward for your actions, but inevitably wanting to act in a certain way because a first faint gleam of Heaven is already inside you.”

       Grace is definitely important—it is what saves us.  But works are equally important because it is how we show our love for God.  Even if doing good to our neighbor or kneeling in prayer every night isn’t enough save us, it will bring us closer to God and bring a little Heaven into our lives.  A huge part of exaltation is gaining the ability to love as God does.  It is not a burden but a blessing.

       As I’ve been reading from CS Lewis’ works, the concept of truly loving God has been on my mind.  The only way to find real joy and return to our Father in Heaven is through loving him and submitting ourselves entirely unto Him, and so I’ve been looking at my own testimony a little more skeptically.  I know that God loves me with an amazing love that I am still trying to fully understand, and I see evidence of God’s love for me in all aspects of my life, but how do I truly love Him as deeply and as unconditionally as He loves me?  In Mere Christianity, there is a chapter on forgiveness that discusses how we are to love others.  It is often hard to look past a person’s actions and love them for who they are.  But if we look at how we love ourselves, we can understand this process a little better.  We all make mistakes and we never measure up to what we want to become, but even though we hate those mistakes we know that we can improve.  We pick ourselves back up.  We just keep loving ourselves (in a non-conceited way).  In pondering the way we love ourselves, we can understand how we are to love others and more importantly, how God loves us.  He is eager to forgive us and help us move forward, and he knows our divine potential.  He simply loves us for who we are.  If we can see others through a divine perspective and recognize that mistakes are part of mortality, we can learn to love as God does.  So how do we love God “with all our might, mind, and strength”? Through humble prayer, studying His word, and obeying His commandments, we can come to know of His love.  When we submit our will to His, we are immersed in His love, and He will in turn teach us how to love.  I still do not understand this concept completely, but I think that by learning how to love our fellow man, as well as ourselves, through His love, love will naturally become a part of who we are.

       The Great Divorce really echoed a concept that I have always believed to be true—whether you go to heaven or to hell is entirely up to you.  Any weakness or temptation you are faced with can be overcome when you give yourself over to God and His will.  I loved the episode about the dark oily man with a lizard on his shoulder, representing lust.  It took a lot of convincing for the man to give up his vice because he was afraid of what he’d be without it, but once he submitted his will to God’s, he was completely transformed.  What I found interesting was that after the red lizard was killed, its remains were also transformed into a brilliant white horse. If we come unto God with our weaknesses, and humble ourselves, He will “make weak things strong.”  However, what I found equally interesting was how close some people could come to heaven and then walk away from God’s love, often in pursuit of a counterfeit love.  For example, the mother “loved” her son so much that she would have dragged him back down to hell with her if given the chance, and she was so blinded by her own small idea of love that she failed to understand God’s all-encompassing love.  Even when we feel we are seeking the best things in life, if our focus is not on God, we are headed in exactly the wrong direction.  But what is also amazing about this concept is that if we do turn our hearts to God, no matter what roadblocks stand in our way, He will bring us home.  Ultimately, we will end up where we want to be.

       This past week I read The Screwtape Letters for my CS Lewis literature class and was amazed at how much spiritual insight its pages contained.  One thing I took from the book was how little power the devil really has over us in comparison to God.  Although the devils in the story found hundreds of sneaky ways to manipulate their “patients” into sin, they were constantly overcome by “the Enemy”.  In a few letters Screwtape complained about some of the unfair advantages that God had and how they couldn’t wrap their minds around the concept of love, and you just have to feel sorry for them.  They have absolutely no shot at finding any type of joy except through God, but they don’t realize how easy God makes it to return to Him and become like Him.  The devil can twist things and try to pull us off course, but we are never out of reach of the Atonement and loving guidance from Heaven.  No matter how many times we make the same mistake or push God out of our lives, He is always there to lead us back to safety.